Becoming a Better Boss Secret 3: Coaching, Mentoring, and Counseling: Which One?

We need to constantly encourage and guide our employees – the question is what is the right way to do what and when! Coaching, counseling, and mentoring are techniques used daily by bosses everywhere, and all three have specific purposes. Let’s discuss the differences and benefits of each.

COACHING focuses on positive reinforcement and development of new skills. Coaching is:

  • A conversation focused on helping others move forward.
  • Tied to something the person wants to accomplish – the goals they want to achieve.
  • About making improvements in individual and organizational performance.
  • About asking the right questions and not about giving advice (that’s mentoring!).

MENTORING focuses on support and development. A coach and a mentor have different jobs: a coach is someone who knows how to ask the right questions while a mentor is someone who can support you based on their own experience.

Mentoring can be done formally or informally. Either way, here are basic steps for getting started. Know that mentoring relationships require commitment from both parties to achieve successful outcomes.

To get started with mentoring:

  • Find a mentor/protégé (don’t be afraid to ask).
  • Establish relationship rules (how do you want to be contacted, for example).
  • Agree on a schedule for meetings.
  • Begin with the end in mind. (Goals!)
  • Write a “contract” and define expectations on both sides of the relationship.

COUNSELING is used to focus on corrective action and changing inappropriate or ineffective behavior. If you are at the point of counseling an employee, it is most likely time to involve your support systems (such as Human Resources and your boss).

Counseling is needed when the goal is to change undesired behavior. Counseling is:

  • Guidance
  • A means of providing direction, assisting, and developing
  • A way to address specific behavior patterns
  • Exploring and finding options to help facilitate change

In summary, there are distinct differences in coaching, counseling and mentoring. It is wise to understand the differences and be able to use the best technique to get desired results.

  • Coaching is used to help an employee learn new skills, to reinforce positive behavior, to reach the next level.
  • Mentoring focuses on support and development.
  • Counseling is used to change inappropriate or undesired behavior.

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